Pastor Kevin Myers of 12Stone church just co-authored a book with John Maxwell titled,  Home Run.  In the book, life is compared to a baseball diamond.  One must run to first base before he continues on to second, third, and then home.  Although we may laugh in little league to see the batter run to third base first, Kevin points out that beyond little league, it is no longer humorous.  However, in life that is exactly what we have done—we continue to run the bases backwards and wonder why we are left feeling empty and depressed by time we reach home plate.

While listening to Pastor Kevin Myers’ analogy this past Sunday, I realized that the same thing has been done when it comes to intimacy.  We have run the bases backwards.  In today’s society a couple is almost encouraged to become physically intimate upon the first date.  Sex is crammed down our throats through every venue possible—movies, television programming, commercials, magazines, music, books, etc.  The list is exhaustive!  The expectation is that a couple should have sex before marriage.  Third base has become first.

Once a couple has had sex, then they work on developing a friendship.  Yet, these friendships are superficial; there is no authenticity.  Even so, the couple—usually one party more than the other—will cling to this relationship because they know deep down that sex is an act of the utmost intimacy.  They desperately want to cultivate a committed friendship which will eventually lead to marriage.  Second base is challenging to reach.

If the couple ends up surviving this second step of the game, many times they do marry and, like in my case, after the marriage many discover God and forge a relationship with Him.  Then the task of developing spiritual intimacy begins.  After building on the physical as the foundation for the relationship, this is the most difficult step.  It requires complete disclosure.  All the masks must come off, and many times, we do not like what is revealed.  We realize we married someone we never would have chosen had we been in relationship with God at the time.  First base is nearly impossible.

If we would just run the bases as God designed, the game would go according to plan and reaching the next base would be the most natural progression.  When will we realize we cannot continue to run the bases backwards?  We cannot build intimacy with a physical bond as the adhesive.  It will never be strong enough to hold together the relationship when the storms of life come crashing through our doors.  Intimacy must be built with God as the foundation.  After that, the friendship follows, then the love making.  And what is home plate?  Fulfilling, delightful intimacy!